Juvenile, but very funny.

With any story, there is a setup process. Here is the setup to this story. About 6 months ago, I was making a purchase with my credit card and when I went to sign the electronic signature machine, it was broken. By broken, I mean that when I touched the pen to the machine, it went crazy and didn't look anything like my signature. It looked like a drunk 4 year old signed my name for me. It accepted the signature without any problems. So this really made me wonder what I could do to give my credit card company something to laugh about. I mean, they obviously don't review the signatures since they never called me or declined a purchase. For fucks sake, it could have been a stolen card.

I started out modest by signing with a line or an "X". Occasionally I would do last name first. After a couple of months, I became bolder. I wrote goofy shit, drew pictures, etc. Here's a list of some of my favorite signatures over the past few months:

• I AM NOT KINGPIN
• I STOLE THIS
• FUCK OFF
• FUCK YOU
• WALMART SUCKS
• CALL ME
• CROTCHY CROTCHINGTON
• MY BALLS ITCH
• 911
• I'M A CRIMINAL
• THANKS FOR THE STUFF

Today I went the extra mile. When it came time to sign my name, a thought popped in my head. I should draw a picture. But what picture should I draw? I smirked as something completely juvenile came to me.

Read the rest here.

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